Last night i woke up from a dead sleep, sure I heard a noise. I lay there straining to hear if mom or dad was up, sure I was hearing them walk around. I tried to guess what time it was and how long I had to keep sleeping before those footsteps were going to come upstairs and stop in front of my door. I kept thinking maybe I dreamt the noises, maybe its still the middle of the night.
The longer I lay there (it seemed like 10 minutes but in reality was probably about 20 seconds) the more something felt "not quite right." Was I in the right room? I squinted to see where the door was to orientate myself...getting more and more confused as I kept waking. "This isn't my room....do I live at home?...am I spending the night somewhere....wait a minute....i don't think I'm a kid anymore..." As if to prove my point, Justin rolled over beside me and suddenly it rushed over me that there were about ten years between my feelings and my reality just then. I had to get up and turn on the lights to clear my head.
I seriously felt like a 14 yr old lying in my bed, and to age 10 years in 2 seconds was very bizarre. Talk about fast forward. I'm an adult now. Grown up. Old practically. When did this happen? How did I go from 'always in trouble for sleeping in' to 'married living in another country, many many miles from mom and dad?'
Am I ready for this? Too late for that question! Do I really want to be a grown up?
No, I don't. And that is why its now 1:15pm on Saturday afternoon and I'm in my pajamas. Thats why we watched cartoons this morning. (actually, there were no cartoons so we watched some Canadian athletic convention thingy but...close enough.) I'll grow up when I have kids...I'd love to say I won't but I think messy diapers and sticky fingers will keep me from being so blissfully lazy when I have kids. Until than....stick in another cartoon!
1 week ago